Att Would Like Your Feed Back Msi Survey
The conversations you're allowed to have and not allowed to have (with Kate Snow and Haje Kamps)
We are back with Kate's last episode for a while! Recorded on the very last day of her tenure as HAI's marketing director, we reflect on how much we've grown and changed over these past four seasons of podcasts. Worry ye not, though, dear listener: Kate is going on her honeymoon and taking a break after completing her therapy degree, but Haje is continuing to carry the torch for the rest of Season 4... And a little birdie told us that Kate may be back as a guest host in the near future. How utterly delightful! Enjoy the episode, and be well
47:08
May 13, 2022
Fifty first dates after fifty (with Carolyn Arnold)
Join us for a rich and stimulating conversation about what our guest, Carolyn Arnold, calls her "dating experiment." She takes us through her process of setting up the experiment, and we get a peek into the valuable lessons she learned as she set out to date 50 different people after she had turned 50 years old. Kate and Haje also share some of their dating experiences and we explore what it would be like to shift the focus of dating and our assumed goals. Carolyn Lee Arnold drew upon her thirty years as a social science researcher and ten years as a relationship workshop assistant with the Human Awareness Institute to create the dating project in Fifty First Dates after Fifty, which is the title of her first book. Carolyn lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her partner, one of her fifty dates. For more information, including dating resources, visit CarolynLeeArnold.com.
45:56
January 28, 2022
Fat is not a feeling (with Leah Carey)
When Leah first showed people her podcast, one of her early listeners gasped - but good girls don't talk about sex! - and, of course, that became the name of her podcast. She hastens to add that the podcast isn't just good girls - and, in fact, not just girls, either. She joined us on the Human Awareness podcast for a most delightful episode talking about body image, emotional pressure, and how she went from being frozen stiff with fear at the thought of someone seeing her body naked - to finding herself in spaces where nudity was normal and okay. Leah Carey is a sex and intimacy coach and host of the podcast "Good Girls Talk About Sex." She works with people eager to explore new avenues of their sexuality and fulfill their greatest desires, like: diving back into the dating pool after a long time away, having first-time queer experiences, investigating consensual non-monogamy, or learning how to communicate about kink. Leah's superpower is radical empathy. When you work with her, she reflects your true sexual nature back to you without judgment, so you can see yourself without shame.
49:34
January 21, 2022
Holding boundaries, with kindness (with Kate and Haje)
In our season finale for season 3, your hosts Kate and Haje end up talking about loving brightly, healing shame, the power of new relationship energy (NRE), and the nature of boundaries and how they can be held with kindness. We also talk about showing up for people who need us while not being fully resourced ourselves, and how it's possible to communicate through situations like that with grace, while still leaving some space for yourself to show up authentically and in integrity. It's a sweet, free-wheeling conversation about a number of topics - and we hope it will give you a lot to think about along the way! After this episode, Human Awareness will be taking a little break, but we will lovingly return to your ears by ways of a podcasting app near you in the new year. Happy holidays and have a very peaceful rest of the year! 🤟
48:45
December 10, 2021
Eco-Eroticism (with Sarah Belzile)
In this episode, we talk with Sarah Belzile about the joys of reconnecting with nature in a deeper sense than you might be used to - what happens when we open our heart to the deeply erotic within ourselves - and the natural world around us? Sarah Belzile is passionate about the exploration of pleasure as a spiritual practice and loves to facilitate eco-erotic experiences. She has served as an administrator and associate faculty for the Body Electric School, one of the country's oldest and most trusted names in erotic education. She is also a Women's Temple Facilitator, Professional Cuddlist, Certified Cuddle Party Facilitator, Akhanda yoga teacher, founder of the Red River Gorge Popup Ashram, and a teacher of NVC, Non-Violent Communication. She is an avid rock climber and lives in her natural habitat, the moss, and ferns of the Red River Gorge. You can learn more about her work at SarahBelzile.com. Sign up for her newsletter and you will receive the password for the "erotic playground" section of her site where you will find an eco erotic self-pleasure practice, among other treats.
42:45
August 20, 2021
Creativity isn't a final product - it's the journey (with Patricia Varga)
When Patricia was diagnosed with cancer, she found ways of processing her grief and recovery with art - and soon made it her life's mission to help others do the same. In this episode, she talks with Kate and Haje about how creativity, the healing process, and how all forms of art can be used to shift the experience of one's journey with cancer, pain, and illness. Patricia is a publisher, author, artist and leadership coach recognized for her ability to engage people in their healing process. Her signature program Create to Heal is taught in hospitals and cancer centers across the country, as well as in domestic violence shelters worldwide. Also a survivor, Patricia works with patients, providers and medical school students on the art and practice of mindfulness, gratitude and compassion. She is the CEO and founder of the Women with Wings foundation - and you can learn more about Patricia and her work on their website, and on Patricia's own site at PatriciaVarga.com.
31:26
July 02, 2021
Asking for what you want (with Marcia Baczynski)
There's a special kind of bravery associated with knowing what you want - and then daring to ask for it. In this episode, Haje interviews Marcia, about the wants and needs of humans, and how to dig deeper into the likes and wants lurking inside us. Marcia is an internationally recognized speaker, writer, coach, and expert on sexual communication, relationships, and women's empowerment. Her primary mission is to help women and the people who love them to overcome shame and get in touch with what they truly want — romantically, sexually, and relationally — even if it's off the beaten path. As co-founder of Cuddle Party, Marcia has helped tens of thousands of people to speak up for the kind of touch they want, say No unapologetically, and foster more connected, affectionate relationships. Her popular virtual course, "The Good Girl Recovery Program," helps women to break out of the roles that keep them small and unsatisfied, and move into being more of who they are in all areas of their lives. You can find out more about Marcia and her work at askingforwhatyouwant.com
41:08
June 04, 2021
Cuddles, hugs, and touch, oh my (with Yoni Alkan)
"I've always been told I give great hugs, and I really wanted to share them with people." Dr. Yoni Alkan explores the beauty of hugs, cuddles, and other forms of non-sexual touch. On this episode of Human Awareness, we talk about Cuddle Party®, being a Cuddlist®, and the importance of sharing touch with other human beings. We all may recognize the value of affection - but what if we lived in a world where it was more readily given and received? We explore this idea and more on this particularly cozy episode. Dr. Yoni Alkan is a sexual educator and a sexual consultant with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality and a Masters in Conflict Resolution and Mediation, he is also a professional one-on-one cuddler with Cuddlist and a Certified Cuddle Party Facilitator in San Francisco. Yoni is a TED speaker at TEDxSoMa 2019, and the author of The Book of Cuddles which is an instructional on cuddling that teaches how to better your touch. He is also the creator of Elements of Sexuality; a playful, geeky, and educational site about the elements that contribute to our sexuality.
34:53
April 09, 2021
Finding authenticity online (with Sarah Yates Mora)
Is there a space for being 'real' in the world of Instagram and the endless hunt for dopamine hits in the world of Social Media? In this episode, Kate talks with Sarah Yates Mora about the highs and lows of being a heart-open human being in the universe of influencers, internet trolls, and endless distractions. They talk about how to tame the "dragon mom" inside, and how to find an authentic connection in a rapidly evolving digital world. Sarah Yates Mora is a photographer, interior designer, and artist who creates beauty with everything she touches. Her authenticity and stunning imagery has drawn over 35 thousand followers. Her work is inspired by earth tones and a connection to nature, and her philosophy is rooted in speaking honestly and from the heart. You can find Sarah on Instagram at @SarahYatesMora
32:19
March 19, 2021
Sex and Aging (with Laurie Handlers)
Can aging deliver us from the limitations of youth? Does sex and intimacy really get better with time? In this rich and fun conversation, Laurie presents her lifetime evolution towards more free and enjoyable sex – but also, how she learned to enjoy aging. Spoiler-alert: they go hand in hand. Laurie has a Masters degree in Education and a Bachelor's degree in Psychology and Sociology. Her career includes over thirty years as a corporate change consultant, individual empowerment coach and international seminar leader. As a speaker and facilitator, Laurie has taught transformational workshops since 1978 covering topics like how to heal the body, releasing past emotional trauma, stopping the aging process, and reducing stress. You can learn more on LaurieHandlers.com
47:35
February 26, 2021
The art of phone sex (with Arielle Brown)
In this episode, Kate and Haje interview Arielle Brown. Reducing this episode to 'phone sex' is like saying that a three-Michellin-star meal is about 'absorbing nutrients' - what was meant to be a Valentines-themed guide to how to make erotic connection happen from a distance turned into something far deeper - and far yummier - than we would have dared hope for. We think you're going to love this one… Arielle is a teacher of intimacy, sexuality, and embodied communication. She supports individuals, couples, and groups to embody and express their deepest truths and desires, so they can access more freedom, pleasure and genuine fuflillment in their lives and intimate relationships. She currently resides on the Big Island of Hawaii, offers her services through private in-person retreats, virtual one-on-one containers, and community offerings rooted in ritual and connection. Learn more at www.ariellebrown.com.
42:17
February 14, 2021
Is marriage a relic of the past? (with Frank Mondeose)
Frank Mondeose joins Kate and Haje in this episode to talk about marriage. We talk about the history of marriage, and whether the social circumstances have shifted far enough that marriage itself still makes sense. We get deep into a conversation about what marriage is, how it serves us, and whether it run its course as an institution. As you can imagine, all three of us have a lot of thoughts and curiosities about marriage, and the resulting conversation serves as a wonderful examination of how people make decisions about their lives and about how people can evolve in the context of a relationship. Frank Mondeose has taught Sexual Shamanism in over 10 countries, and is a contemporary voice on Love, Eros & Relating. He embodies both play and pray, which is reflected on his YouTube web series "The Spiritual Playboy". He is lead faculty with ISTA, the International Schools of Temple Arts, co-founder of ReMENber Brotherhood Journey, Shamanic Minister for Venus Rising Association for Transformation, and creator of the lifestyle brand Monde Osé, Frank has touched the hearts, and minds of many, whether it be through tantalizing their imaginations at his multi-sensorial events, to inspirational interactions that have navigated people to accessing their personal power.
44:56
January 29, 2021
Embracing Jealousy (with Chas August)
In this episode, we talk about the importance of experiencing and expressing your emotions in a non-destructive way. Primarily, we take a deep look at jealousy. Why do we feel jealous? What can we do to embrace this feeling and use it for good in our life and our relationships? As we talk about jealousy, themes of self-worth, beauty, belonging, and even our relationship to our pets emerge and illuminate just how complex this topic is. Chas is a life coach, working with individuals, couples, and families. Through his deep understanding of people, psychologically and emotionally, he provides a compassionate and holistic environment for personal growth. His coaching style is to work with the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, empowering lasting transformation. The goal of the work is to help clients experience a love-filled and satisfying life. He has been actively involved with HAI since 1988, as a workshop participant, an Intern, a Facilitator (1991-2008), and in various other paid and volunteer capacities, and is the recipient of the Stan Dale Lifetime Service Award. Chas is also an independent workshop leader, podcaster, and hypnotherapist. He is a certified Instructor of Parent Effectiveness Training and teaches listening, conflict resolution, and communication skills. Learn more on his website: chasaugust.com
45:57
January 15, 2021
I want Big Talk - Haje Kamps and Kate Gillispie
Wrapping up our second season, your hosts Haje and Kate get into a delightful conversation reflecting on how the past 20 or so episodes have gone - and what we've learned along the way. It's a wonderful, connected conversation. May I Have This Dance will be taking a little break - but we'll be back later in the year!
44:57
August 07, 2020
You don't have to eavesdrop - Dixie De La Tour
Dixie De La Tour is a sexual folklorist, professional storyteller, podcaster, teacher, storytelling coach, community builder and most of all, a facilitator. She is also the Founder, Curator & Host of the Award-winning storytelling series, Bawdy Storytelling that's been lauded for its transformational, relatable, empowering performances. In this episode, Haje and Kate talk to Dixie to discover what brought her to sexy storytelling - and how, after thirteen years on the road, she just keeps on going. She even shares one of her stories with us during the podcast! Dixie has recently been a featured storyteller for the National Storytelling Conference, and in addition to story and public speaking coaching for her own Bawdy series, she coaches for events such as TEDx, Women in Technology, and for Kink and Sexual Conferences Conferences, Classrooms and Public Libraries.
49:09
July 31, 2020
Mutual trust in parenting - Kirby Gillispie
Today we have a very special episode to offer in which Haje interviews Kate, AND her mom, Kirby. You can feel the love palpitating in all directions during this intimate, inspiring conversation about raising children with mutual trust, open communication, and the understanding that human beings evolve over time.
43:28
July 10, 2020
How can I put more love into the world - Jason Weston
In this episode, Haje interviews Jason, one of the facilitators at HAI, about racism and prejudice, gender identity, and having love for every human who ever lived - and ever will live. It's a beautiful episode full of gentleness and exploration - we think you'll love it! Jason Weston has been a part of the Human Awareness Institute community for more than 40 years. As a facilitator, Jason assists individuals and couples in creating for themselves the lives they really want by guiding them to see and express their own beauty, power and love. He was trained at the Process Therapy Institute and holds a degree in philosophy from the University of California, Berkeley. Jason served for many years as the Executive Director of HAI Global, and is passionate about creating a world in which all people have their needs met, and nature is allowed to thrive. Jason is also a fine art photographer whose work is internationally collected. A descendent of a long line of fine art photographers in California, he works in his own way in continuing the tradition. See jasonweston.com for more about Jason.
46:41
June 26, 2020
The Relationship Between Porn and World Peace - Cindy Gallop
In this episode, Cindy Gallop takes us into her work of carving out a platform for "social sex." Her organization, "Make Love, Not Porn," is pro sex, pro porn, and pro knowing the difference between the two. Listen in as Cindy describes how reshaping how we think about porn can lead to world peace – yes seriously. Cindy Gallop is the founder and CEO of www.makelovenotporn.com, launched at TED 2009 – 'Pro-sex. Pro-porn. Pro-knowing the difference'. In 2013 she turned MakeLoveNotPorn into the world's first user-generated, human-curated social sex videosharing platform https://www.makelovenotporn.tv/ socializing and normalizing sex in order to make it easier to talk about, to promote consent, communication, good sexual values and good sexual behavior.
40:38
June 12, 2020
It doesn't matter who you love, but how you love - Kimball Lane
Kimball Lane took the helm as Executive Director for The Human Awareness Institute nine months ago. Since then she has made a reputation for herself as someone who has clarity, vision, and the ability to move mountains with grace and care. During this intimate interview, Kimball shares many of her personal life experiences that have led her to become the heart-first leader that she is. We learn how Kimball moved from holding Love as something big and unattainable to something much more simple… something that was there all along. Kimball shares with us her personal life philosophy that "it doesn't matter who you love, but how you love." You can find out more about Kimball and her coaching practice on http://kimballlane.com , and more about Kimball's role within Hai on https://www1.hai.org/team/kimball-lane .
51:00
June 05, 2020
What does it mean to be normal - Emily Nagoski
Sex educator, researcher and author, Emily Nagoski, pulls us into this compelling conversation where we learn the meaning behind her message that "we are normal," that pie is an excellent metaphor for emotion, and the secret to dealing with burn-out (it's not what you may think!) Emily Nagoski is an expert on women's sexual wellbeing, healthy relationships, and the prevention of sexual violence and harassment. She earned her Ph.D. from Indiana University and interned at the Kinsey Institute Sexual Health Clinic. She worked for eight years as a lecturer and Director of Wellness Education at Smith College before transitioning to become a full-time speaker and writer. She has authored two books, "Come As You Are" and "Burnout." Find out more about Emily and what she does on emilynagoski.com.
49:46
May 30, 2020
High possibility, low expectations - William Winters
William Winters is the founder of a conscious sex community in the bay area called the Bonobo Tribe. What started from a small group of friends who wanted the freedom to explore and connect, evolved into a culture of inclusion and community. Haje interviews William, and they get deeply into how a pandemic may get in the way of meeting in person - but not of interpersonal connection.
36:36
May 15, 2020
Planting Seeds for Equality - Marci Graham
In this interview with HAI's Facilitator Marci Graham, we explore how to begin breaking down and changing patterns of inequity, patterns that are woven into our dynamics, our relationships, and our identities. Marci is a visionary who takes the stand for a future in which no woman, man or child is treated as less than whole. And she is also a brilliant teacher. Her compassion and wisdom gives her a unique perspective for understanding the underbelly of a history we are only just beginning to unravel. Trigger Warning: There are some mild references to boundary crossings in this episode. Marci Graham is uniquely and simultaneously soft and fierce in her compassion for human beings. She has a 30-year history of soul searching and personal transformation through movement, vision questing, painting, writing, sculpting, bodywork, and voracious reading. Marci began as a workshop participant at HAI in 2000, quickly incorporating HAI's mission into her deep knowledge of self. As a Facilitator, Marci brings her strong desire for people to know and love themselves enough to awaken to their magnificence. Marci lives with her partner, Jason Weston, in rural California, where the natural beauty astonishes, delights, and invigorates her every day. Photo of Marci taken by Jason Weston, used with permission
47:11
May 08, 2020
Unabashed bad-assery - Monica Jayne
Monica Jayne speaks to the importance of really knowing ourselves. There is nothing to fix. Nothing to change. Rather, if we give ourselves permission to live fully and explore the full version of ourselves, we create a safer world for everyone. In this episode, Haje and Kate are taken through a series of brilliant concepts for deeply understanding our erotic and human selves. Learn about "erotic blue-prints," listen in as we share personal stories about identity transformation, and share in the many giggle fits we have during this interview. We are so pleased to offer you this valuable, sometimes silly, and at other times heart-wrenching, conversation. May it bring you as much pleasure as it did us. Monica Jayne has facilitated, taught, nurtured, and witnessed 1000s of men and women across 45 countries and 5 continents transforming their lives and influencing them to discover, love, accept, and be who they truly are. She considers herself a "promissory" – being full of acceptance for herself and others. Monica Jayne delivers practical, applicable adult education on sexuality, relationships, communication, identity, expression, authenticity, and vulnerability: all the things we were never taught but should have been. For freebies, goodies, real-life tips, and more awesome information from Monica Jayne, visit MonicaJayne.com/more
55:23
May 01, 2020
We would like your feedback!
Thank you for listening to May I Have This Dance. In this episode, Kate and Haje share our favorite episodes from Season 1, tell you a bit about season 2, and invite you to join us for the live Q&A on April 20. We would love to get your feedback on Season 1: https://forms.gle/SPDv9VzNvbHvriJm6 Learn more about the live Q&A: https://www.thisdance.org/episodes/live-zoom-ama Please share our website with your friends: thisdance.org
13:55
April 30, 2020
Listen in to our first Live Q&A Episode with your lovely hosts, Haje and Kate! We were joined by a wonderful audience of listeners on April 20th who helped to open up an intimate conversation about love, living through coronavirus, pain, optimism and more. It was a fantastic way to kick off Season 2!
39:45
April 24, 2020
Into me you see - Dr. Alison Ash
In the last episode of Season 1, we are talking to Dr. Alison Ash, who has dedicated her life to relationships, play, and sexuality. We talk about how to break the intensifying loop of being in your head, bringing your attention back to your body, and much more besides. It's a beautiful, intimate conversation that we're beyond excited to share with you! Dr. Alison Ash is a sex and intimacy coach and educator, a lecturer at Stanford University, author, and founder of TurnON.love. As a sociologist with a Ph.D. from Stanford, Aly has a comprehensive understanding of the complex societal challenges that often lead to unsatisfying and disempowering sexual experiences. Aly designs workshops and retreats and offers individuals and couples coaching to give others the tools to discover their desires and confidently pursue them. She invites you to TurnON pleasure, intimacy and love at TurnON.love
39:08
April 13, 2020
The mechanics of building trust - Bob DeRosier
Bob DeRosier is a long-time HAI community member. He wears many hats in this organization, as well as in his life. A workshop team member, a technical wizard, and a friend to many, Bob is the kind of person we all hope to have in our lives. In this episode, Bob shares about his childhood, his experiences at Stanford, and his experience stepping into the role of step-parent to young teenage boys. It's real life. It's real connection. Bob DeRosier is HAI's Technology Director and has been a part of the HAI community since the 1980s. He has worked on Team for our workshops since the 1990s and been a long-term volunteer within the organization.
46:05
April 03, 2020
Living from Your Turn-On – Danielle Harel
In a beautiful conversation with Danielle Harel, co-founder of the Somatica Institute of Sex and Relationship Coaching, we learn about living life from your "Turn-On". What makes you excited, tingly and awake? Danielle describes using her "Turn-On" to guide her decision-making processes and explores how to connect with the creative energy that stimulates and enlivens us. We talk about family and immigration, her sex-coach work and more. YUMMY. Danielle Harel, Ph.D. is the co-founder of the Somatica Institute of Sex and Relationship Coaching. She brings a tenacious dedication to self-realization in all of her teaching and coaching. Danielle has a Ph.D. in Human Sexuality Studies and an M.A. in Social Work. She sees clients in her Sunnyvale office and trains professionals in the Somatica Method – an experiential and body-based method of interpersonal coaching.
38:36
March 27, 2020
A shift in the dynamic - Alicia Davon
In this episode, Kate and Haje talk to Alicia Davon. She's a teacher of sexuality and intimacy, alongside her husband Erwan Davon (who we interviewed for Episode 4). In this conversation, we get into the contrasts between being a sexual being, a lover, a wife, and a mom - and how to stay present for shifting dynamics and shaking off the social conditioning that goes with all of that. In particular, we explore how to keep intimacy in a relationship in combination with working together, and how to notice challenges in relationships in real time - as they come up - and how to tackle them as they come along. Learn more about the work Erwan and Alicia do together at ErwanDavon.com.
35:18
March 13, 2020
In a position of choice - Haje Kamps
Listen in as Kate and Haje indulge in our second, hosts-only conversation of the season. This time, Kate interviews Haje and we learn more about how his mind, highly active and imaginative, has brought him on a somewhat eclectic journey of passion, creativity and self-discovery. When he's not hosting the HAI podcast, Haje helps startups tell their stories - see haje.me or @Haje on Twitter.
33:23
February 28, 2020
Marrying Myself - Siobhan Doherty
When Siobhan went through a difficult break-up, she was left with a heavy heart and a difficult challenge: How do you bounce back from heartbreak? The old saying "you have to love yourself before you love someone else" sprung to mind, and she came to a realization: The one relationship that is going to exist for all of her life, is that with herself. Why not make it official, and marry herself? So, that's what she did. In this episode, Haje dives into a wonderful conversation with Siobhan about what being an actor has taught her about being human - and what being human has taught her about connecting with people. They are also getting into how life as a newly-wed - to herself - has impacted her life, and how making a commitment to herself has changed the way she sees relationships, and life itself. You can learn more about Siobhan at siobhanvoice.com
36:08
February 14, 2020
A hole in my Ego - Erwan Davon
With Erwan, we talk about how when you're a child, you don't necessarily know that you are having a difficult childhood, and the ripples that has had on his life, how that ultimately led him to his current career. Erwan has been a relationship coach for 25 years, helping couples carve out a pathway to the high-vibe, passionate, romantic, and lasting relationships we all crave. We get into that, and so much more - enjoy! To learn more about Erwan's work, see https://erwandavon.com .
44:01
January 31, 2020
When Loving Life is the Antidote to Pain - Kate Gillispie
In this episode Haje and Kate play with the concept of podcasting in our first co-host interview. We dive deep into conversation about Kate's history with trauma and how adversity has the potential to bring beauty, and love, into our lives.
39:19
January 17, 2020
Empowered around our trauma - Celeste Hirschman
In this episode, Celeste Hirschman describes her evolution with truth, honesty and intimacy. "It's possible to stay in connection, even through the shifts of relationship, if we stay honest." Listen in as we explore this woman's commitment, despite the odds, to maintaining loving and healthy sexual relationships throughout her life.
36:33
January 03, 2020
I Hope To Experience That Kind of Loss - Peter Rengel
Peter is an exquisite human. He has traveled the world and journeyed deeply within too. In this episode, Peter shares with us about the course of his 30+ year long marriage, what it was like to live in an ashram, and what he was surprised to learn about himself along the way.
48:03
January 01, 2020
May I Have this Dance is a brand new podcast produced by the Human Awareness Institute. This episode is the teaser - an introduction of sorts to your co-hosts Kate and Haje, and a bit of a sneak preview for what you can expect going forward. If you know someone who should be interviewed on this podcast - or if you want to nominate yourself - check out https://www.thisdance.org/ for contact information. Season 1 will start being released on January 1st, 2020 - stay tuned, and see you then!
36:54
November 24, 2019
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